Obtainable Celebrity Crush: An Update

Folks, it's not looking so good with Jason Segel. This whole him dating Michelle Williams is really cramping my style and chances with him. The worst part is, she seems like she is a pretty nice person. I mean girlfriend has been on Dawson's Creek with James Van der Beek!! I've got nothing to even go up against that. She has also been nominated for an Oscars. The closest I have in competition for that is the 3rd place ribbon I got for a track meet in 7th grade. I should also mention there were only 3 runners including myself in that race. 

I will always love him but think it's time to refocus my efforts on my new obtainable crush, Jack Johnson, from New Girl.